Yannie Ho, MPH
CACCC Project Coordinator
During the beginning of May, I was able to participate in my first ever Heart to Heart® Café, and coincidentally with COVID-19’s social distancing restrictions still in place and for the sake of safety, this session also marked CACCC’s first ever online Heart to Heart® Café. The entire experience was very pleasant and heartwarming, with a total of 25 participants joining into this intimate online activity to talk about our feelings and views about end of life wishes. After a brief introduction of the special meanings placed within each of the 4 categories within the Heart to Heart® deck along with all the end of life issues inside, we were separated into small breakout rooms with 6 attendees and 1 facilitator to elaborate on the top 3 Heart to Heart® cards we each feel are most important.
The facilitator I was assigned to is Catherine, who I felt really connected to all of us and led us to very meaningful discussions. After an end of life issue was selected, she would follow up with questions for us to have deeper thinking on and actions that we may take to address those particular issues. The one card that really resonated within our small group was “I don’t want to be a burden to my family”, with nearly everyone picking it as an important end of life issue. Burden comes in many forms, whether emotional, physical, or financial, and the future of not knowing what may come up and put a strain on all our loved ones is frightening. The guidance that we received include broaching conversations with family in preparation of unexpected situations, and preparation in the form of advance healthcare directive (AHCD).
Coming out of this experience, I believe that all of us were able to express more or less our inner thoughts concerning end of life, not to mention more clarity and direction on how to ensure our wishes are conveyed to family and friends. Even though this was an online activity, there was no awkwardness at all and the atmosphere was very welcoming and inclusive. Talking about death together with everyone was not scary at all, I even felt comforted after the discussion, since I got to identify what key issues are important to me. I was very fortunate to have the opportunity to take part in this Heart to Heart® Café by CACCC, and highly recommend this experience to anyone who want to learn more about the many end to life issues, as well as discover which may be most relevant to themselves.